


In Icy Grace

by cakelocked



Category: The Terror (TV 2018)
Genre: Gen, Lads Being Nerds, Nature, interpersonal relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-02-12 16:11:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21479179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cakelocked/pseuds/cakelocked
Summary: Terror bingo prompt fill for glacier.In the early days of the expedition James is being a huge nerd about some icebergs.Francis has something to say to this.
Relationships: Captain Francis Crozier & Commander James Fitzjames
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23
Collections: The Terror Bingo (2019)





	In Icy Grace

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta'ed. My apologies for the grammar as well as my attempt at naval lingo. :D

_Erebus_ led on, a fair wind billowing in her sails. _Terror_ followed behind keeping a safe distance between the two ships. It was not a full week since they’d said farewell to the whalers and since then they hadn’t seen single soul other than those on their expedition. The weather was turning steadily colder, the frost starting to creep up the deck and the ropes of the rigging. The windows of the great cabin were decorated by it, the brilliant shapes flowering dazzling in the light.

James Fitzjames stood at the bow, looking out to the sea. At the moment he was alone but for the men who had duty on the deck. He had strictly speaking no duty there at the moment, but had chosen to come up anyway, to enjoy the view and a fleeting moment of quietness. The sun shone up in the sky, its light bright enough to blind. Despite its brightness, or perhaps because of it, everything seemed bit bleached. _It is as if the world is losing its colour bit by bit_, he mused.

He let his eyes rest on the horizon. Tonight it would be their turn to dine aboard_Terror_, and he found himself curiously reluctant to do so. Surely he should be glad for a chance to meet the crew of their sister ship; besides he could tell his stories to a new audience. Maybe it was the thought of leaving his ship even for a while. The truth was that deep down he knew that the reason for his internal conflict was not the unease of leaving Erebus. It was just that he did not have the energy to deal with Crozier just now.

His morose thoughts were cut short as a shout came from lookout above. “Two icebergs off the larboard side!”

James turned his head and drew his spyglass from the pocket of his coat. Sure enough, there they were. They were significantly bigger than any smaller bits of bergs they’d seen before floating past them. Those he’d written home about on the last letter he’d posted home before they continued onwards from the Disko Bay. The breath caught on James’ throat at the sight. So magnificent. He had of course read about icebergs, read everything he had gotten his hands on the subject of discovery service and their trips to the Poles. Still, reading about them or even seeing the drawn pictures hadn’t prepared him to see a real one. The sheer size alone was enough to dazzle him, and the sun reflecting off the ice in hues of crystalline blue almost overwhelmed him.

James finally put his spyglass away when his hands got too tired to hold it up. The buoyant mood didn’t leave him after that for the rest of the day, not even when Sir John announced that he was not feeling too well and would have to skip the dinner. James just simply bid him good night and swift recovery before he got to boat off to Terror with Gore, Fairholme, Dundy and Mr Collins accompanying him.

//

“Those bergs were an utterly magnificent sight, I say! The size and the colours, I have never seen such a collection of hues of blue before; it was though it was _glowing_.” Fitzjames stopped to draw breath, his hands continuing to wave around in an effort to express his feelings.

Francis looked at the man, his hands moving in big arcs, his face glowing with enthusiasm. He remembered seeing a proper iceberg for the first time and feeling much the same. It felt like a lifetime ago, and it probably was too.

Fitzjames continued,“And the size! They were _colossal_. I'd say the other one was almost the size of _Erebus_. I could hardly put the 'glass down before my hands got too tired to keep it up! I can’t but wish that I could see whole glacier. What a magnificent sight it must be.” His full presence bubbled with such genuine enthusiasm that it was downright catching. Not even Francis could bring himself to be more annoyed than he normally was.

Well, it might have had something to do with the wine they’d broken out after hearing that Sir John was unfortunately indisposed for the evening. So, instead of making any kind of sneering comment, Francis took a hearty sip of wine. It was no whiskey but it and the freedom from being judged by Sir John or having to hear his old tales of his time on Van Diemen’s Land yet again again factored somewhat to his almost jovial mood. He did not mean to speak, he hadn’t so far in the evening, not besides commenting on the obligatory report on the ice and such, and the formalities had been over well before the dinner had started.

Now though, he found himself directing his words at Fitzjames. “Those bergs today were nothing compared to those in the South. There is no glacier like that on Arctic that we know of, the pack ice does not pile as high. The one on Antarctica was a full continent of ice on its own. Once we saw a bit of it break off, and the piece was bigger than Houses of Parliament. The tidal wave it caused would have been enough to damage our ships had we been too close.”

There, he paused, a far-off look on his eyes before shaking it off and continuing. “We should be lucky to avoid bergs like those on our voyage here. One mishap and unlucky hit and the ship will sink.” While not particularly merry speech, it was altogether more than Francis had said to Fitzjames on their whole acquaintance so far without it sounding like a call to argument.

James looked at Crozier, still not sure if the other man wanted to start and argument or not. Usually James could be sure that yes, it was exactly what Crozier wanted. Most of the times they were in the same room ended with thinly veiled barbs being exchanged around increasingly harried Sir John. Now, Captain Crozier seemed merely content with having made his point and went back to nursing his wine. Other people took over the conversation even pulling Crozier’s steward Jopson in, as one of them remembered that he had been the Captain’s steward on the expedition to the South too.

The rest of the dinner was quite pleasant affair compared to the previous ones.

//

Francis and James were the last ones in the wardroom for whatever reason. James had at last gotten truly warm and was loath to leave the almost warm room in order to return to _Erebus_, even if he was sharing the room with a grumpy Irishman.

Francis was feeling still somewhat mellow, the dinner had gone almost painlessly and he was experiencing a rare feeling of charitable kinship with the other man. In the absence of Sir John the young commander had been more relaxed as well, Francis had noted with some fascination. There had been stories sure enough, there always were. This time though, the topics hadn’t been quite so carefully polished and boring as they’d been in previous times. But that was just Francis’ private opinion.

James stood by the window and looked outside to the rolling sea. His hands rested on the window pane, tapping an unconscious rhythm. It was that strange time in between the full light and the setting darkness, when the changing light made everything seem less than real and that which was familiar to look strange and dangerous. If there were any more bergs swimming around, he could not see any.

Francis drank the rest of his wine and set his glass aside before he stood up, groaning slightly at the sudden twinge on his back. James didn’t look away from the window, instead following the other man surreptitiously through the reflection in the glass. He turned his eyes away swiftly, swallowing reflexively as Crozier walked over to stand by him. Normally James had a pressing need to talk, to be heard and connect to people. Now though, that need was not there and he found himself merely standing there and looking outside to the darkening sea, not truly looking at anything in particular.

Francis looked sideways at the man standing beside him, his eyebrow raised mockingly. “What, no waxing-poetic speech about the splendour of the view?” His tone was milder than usual, his harsh tone sweetened by the wine and a hint of something else that even he didn’t know what.

James sighed and shook his head enough to whip an errand curl back to its place. “Sometimes there is no need to talk but merely be.”

Francis cleared his throat, both eyebrows rising at astonishment before he caught himself. “Fair enough.”

They stood for a while in a quiet room before Francis turned to face Fitzjames fully before speaking again, his words surprising even himself. “I understand your fascination with the glaciers and icebergs. I have seen few things in my life that were as magnificent as that glacier in the Antarctic. I urge you to remember this though; that beauty is a trap. Out here everything wants to kill us, but the ice is the one that manages it fastest, if we are unlucky.” He looked straight at James’ eyes the full time when he spoke, his gaze strangely mesmerizing, gravitas of his words pulling James in. The spell was broken only when Crozier broke the gaze and turned to walk away, leaving James to stand alone in the deserted wardroom.

//

Later, after their return to _Erebus_, James sat down at the light of his one oil lamp and sketched the bergs he’d seen that day. In a flight of fancy he drew also the glacier Crozier had talked about as he imagined it to be, adding tiny figures of _Erebus_ and _Terror_ beside it, threatened by a huge wave. Afterwards he sat for a minute there, looking at the drawing and the sheer size difference between the ships and the glacier. He might have to agree with Crozier this time.

Still, those bergs had been beautiful. He’d add the drawing to the next letter he’d send to William and Eliza back in England. They’d surely like it.

**Author's Note:**

> So, some of you might've noticed that I know shit-all about glaciers or icebergs (except that they look really pretty and the water's drinkable). :D  
Originally this was supposed to be 100% James fanboying about the icebergs all by himself but then I realised it would've been boring as hell to read.  
Also, somehow I can't manage to write stuff with no Francis.


End file.
